Friday, 13 November 2009
कविता ""बिस्थापित""
""बिस्थापित ""
सोचाइका फाँटहरु
धाजा फाँटेका गराजस्तै
किन पत्र पत्र चिरिएका छन् तिम्रा
छिमेकीले मिचेको साँधजस्तै
किन साँघुरिएकोछ
किन फैलन सकेनन पंख फैलाउँदै
उद्दने चराका एक हुल बथान जस्तै भएर
हाम्रा रहर बिगत भन्दा चुलिएका छन्
हाम्रा सपना हिजोका भन्दा स्वदिला भएका छन्
ईच्छ्या फैलिएर सगरमाथा जित्ने होडमा लगिसके
तिमी उही पुरानो सोचको धरहरा उभिइरहेकछौ
आजको आजसँग बेमेल भएर
समयसँगै नजर फेरिईनुपर्ने
परिस्क्रित् हुनुपर्ने बिचार
चुलिनू पर्ने ईच्छ्या
अवतरित हुनुपर्ने नौलो आयाम रहरको
भुमन्डलिकरनको रहस्य भित्र
साँघुरिएको समयले
डायनोसोर र साङ्लोको किम्बदन्ती पछ्याऊँदै
अर्को ईतिहास स्थापित नगरोस्
आजको आजले तिमीलाई बिस्थापित नगरोस् ।।।
बिशेष (2066/kartik/28)
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Bishesh, there is no right or wrong when the question of literature comes. Your poem is very good. I found great potential in you to write poems because you have good poetic sensibility and sweetly flowing language.Another good or interesting thing in your poem is that you have merged imaginative poetic sensibility with reality and practicality. It's really good poem. Keep it on. Ramesh Pokharel
ReplyDeleteअव ताली बजाउने प्रकृया पनि राख व्लगमा । म मज्लाले ताली बजाउछु । वाह! वाह! वाह! । एकदमै परिपक्क लाग्यो कविता मलाई । धेरै धेरै बधाई है!!
ReplyDeletemany many thanks sir for ur great n valuable comments,i do keep it in my mind ever,u r the source of my inspiration in literature..and ashesh u hit my heart to open n i got to know,i have to write something i know....sharing my journey of literature with u.....thanks mate
ReplyDeleteBishesh it is a nice poem.
ReplyDeletePs keep it up.
All the very best.
Shankar Dahal
thank you mama..lot more thanks for the inspiration.
ReplyDeleteDid u write this? Really good. Read others too.
ReplyDeleteya didi,try gareko....
ReplyDeleteYai hoina First bhako kabita ??
ReplyDeleteBabbbbaaal chha la! Ashesh le bhane jastai, tali bajaune widget ni hola katai internet ma, khojera rakha!! ma ni bajauchha pararara.. :-)
And, again I agree Ashesh, our writing is very mature.. I m proud of u brother :-)